The title: I'm writing at 6 AM, because there's something bothering me so much, I can't even sleep. I guess you can say I'm having unsettling feelings.
Moving Right Along: I know that God forgives you for your sins, but I still find it hard to forgive myself. I had a particular sin that plagued me and I guess God taught me a lesson by humiliating me. Or maybe I did this to myself. Every time I think about it, I feel physically sick; my stomach hurts, I feel extremely angry, and I wanna just flee to anywhere. I know I have social anxiety problems, so there is a great chance that I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill, but I literally don't have the skills to rationalize this situation. All I feel is anger. How can people tease you behind your back. You don't bring up their short comings. Then they make snide comments and play with your mind about the situation. Sure it's nothing to them, but it's a big deal to you. I feel huge betrayal of myself and others. God forgives me. I don't forgive myself. And I feel a huge distrust of others. I wish I could let this go, but I think it's going to have a huge impact on my behavior for a while.
Moving Right Along: I know that God forgives you for your sins, but I still find it hard to forgive myself. I had a particular sin that plagued me and I guess God taught me a lesson by humiliating me. Or maybe I did this to myself. Every time I think about it, I feel physically sick; my stomach hurts, I feel extremely angry, and I wanna just flee to anywhere. I know I have social anxiety problems, so there is a great chance that I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill, but I literally don't have the skills to rationalize this situation. All I feel is anger. How can people tease you behind your back. You don't bring up their short comings. Then they make snide comments and play with your mind about the situation. Sure it's nothing to them, but it's a big deal to you. I feel huge betrayal of myself and others. God forgives me. I don't forgive myself. And I feel a huge distrust of others. I wish I could let this go, but I think it's going to have a huge impact on my behavior for a while.
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